Hmmmm, I asked myself the question: "What's LOVE Have to Do With It" and realized it has all of the key elements to sustain my being. If I don't do it, who will. Like a car needs gas to move, or people need food/nourishment to grow, LOVE is needed to feel good about yourself and build this supreme level of confidence that no one can ever take away.
It's quite interesting how we (women) are considered good nurturers and give incomparable love to others to include but limited to: our children, mates, family members, pets and friends BUT the one important person we neglect is OURSELF!!! How does this happen?!? I believe its a natural reaction but then something comes over us...an unusual feeling...one that is rather exhausting and sometimes depressing. We say, "Dag, I am loving everyone else but who is loving ME". Well, that's how I felt and realized I had to do something about it. As a result, I completed a true self evaluation and self therapy to understand what was happening and to take a stand to LOVING ME better.
I want to share some of these great tips with you to help. Trust me, by doing them, OMG, you will feel alot better and learn to LOVE YOU first. Remember, it is key before you can truly LOVE anyone else.
Here
are 24 Ways to LOVE Yourself...
1) Treat Others With Love & Respect
When you bring joy to the lives of others, you find joy in your own. Those that you treat
well will likely repay you with the same kindness. Gradually you will start to feel your
worth through acts of gratitude. God rewards genuine people therefore, don't be very kind to people only to receive royal treatment. It does not work that way.
2) Share Your Being with Others
Create goodwill and
thankfulness by practicing random deeds of kindness. You can mentor, share your knowledge in nice
ways or make a small donation to someone in need (near or far)
3) Express Yourself
Share your thoughts, ideals or time
4) Learn to Let Go of the Past
You deserve a fresh start! There are many people that have had hard lives/bad
beginnings or moments. Don't close yourself out of challenges, grief, disappointments, or
fears of future ridicule. Be in tuned to your feelings, but strive to put them behind you. Cherish learned lessons and how you have changed or grown from them.
5) Forgive Yourself
Don't punish yourself
for things you have done in the past. Instead, look at them as a
learning experience. Say to yourself now: “I forgive myself for _______.” Go
look in a mirror and say it out loud to yourself, look yourself right in the
eyes and speak forgiveness like you mean it. Don't ever demean or ridicule
yourself, or if you do then laugh realizing that was then and this is now.
Every day is a new beginning!
6) Post Positive Statements Where You Will See Them Each and Every Day
"I am wonderfully and beautifully made." or "I have the courage to love." Read them aloud every day. Post it notes are great for such affirmations and goals.
7) Sit In Front of the Mirror
Imagine in the mirror is someone putting you down.
Then practicing calming replying to her, "I do 'not' care," with a
smile. Practice it until you truly believe it.
8) Try to Look Past "Material" Objects and Feelings
We all desire a nice
house, nice things and someone to share our life with. Find your true wants
objectively. Do you crave power, a religion or simply a motive? Sometimes it's
easier to hide the truth from yourself, but figuring out what you really want
will help you know yourself better and hopefully aid in answering important
questions you often ask yourself.
9) Keep a Journal
Write about your
experiences, good and bad. When you write down good experiences, allow yourself
to feel those feelings. When you remember bad experiences, allow yourself to
feel self-compassion. Compassion is not self-pity, but rather willingness to be
present/accept with one's own pain and regret. Most people experienced chronic
emotional invalidation growing up; adults shouldn't expect others to be
validating, and need to learn how to validate themselves. Compassion allows us
to be present with our pain so it can acknowledged and let go.
10) Be Persistent
Work as steadily as
you can at loving and accepting yourself just as you are right now. A large
part of love is accepting another "as is". This is no different for
yourself—learn to love yourself "as is". Only after we've accepted
themselves we might think about changing some less-than desirable
characteristics.
11) Start Working Towards How and What You Want to Be or Do
Do so with a positive
attitude by working toward your higher purposes and greater appreciation of
your problems as motivating your finding new and better opportunities. Be
enthusiastic and cheerful (appropriately)
Celebrate your
accomplishments but let go of the things you haven't...yet? Remember that
success is not a destination. Success is making progress (toward
the desires of your heart). Accept yourself, and others will follow your lead.
You are not your deeds, appearance, or bank balance.
13) Hug Yourself
Show yourself love through a hug by hugging the real you
14) Be Yourself
Be who you really
are, express yourself, laugh, play, sing. Don't be afraid of what others think,
they feel the same way and want to express themselves, but are afraid to show
it too.
15) Trust Yourself
Don't just blindly
follow other peoples suggestions. Learn to trust who you really are.
16) Think of Five (5) Positive Words That Best Describe You
Try not to use words
like *pretty* and *nice*. Try variety.
17) Think About What You Really Want Someone To Be Like In a Relationship
Do those
characteristics also apply to you?
18) Practice Receiving Love
To truly love is to
be able to receive it. When someone loves
you, does some kind deeds to you, say
kind words, give you gifts, or give you compliments, embrace it. Allow yourself
to feel the love that has come your way. Know that you are worthy of love. It
is important to accept a gift of love by others. You give yourself a chance to
learn more about yourself that you are lovable. You give someone a joy of
giving by loving you. Another important way is to practice receiving love by
saying “I love you” to yourself. Let that love fill your heart. Receive that
love that you give to yourself unconditionally.
19) Practice Saying "NO"
It is o.k. to say “no” to people when you do
not feel like doing something. Do not feel guilty about it. Just realize that
you have the right to do so. This is different from doing things out of love.
If you do things out of love and your heart wants to do them, that is a
different story. When your heart does not want to do it and you feel like you
have to please someone, and make others happy by over extending yourself.
Learning how to say “no” is an art. It takes practice. You might say “Thank you
for asking. I am not ready to commit to doing anything right now.” You cannot
please everyone. When you say “no”, remember to smile sincerely and say “no”
gracefully.
20) Do What You Love
What do you love to do? If you could find something that
you love to do and spend time doing it, you will experience love, joy, and
happiness in your heart. That is when you truly connect with your authentic
self. As a result you become happier and more loving.
21) Treat Yourself Like Treating Your Very Best Friend
How do you treat your
very best friend? Do you treat him/her with love, kindness, trust,
appreciation, acceptance, and respect? If you can give that to your friend, why
don’t you give that to yourself? Practice treating yourself like you treat your
very best friend by saying kind words to yourself. Stop calling yourself names.
Stop beating yourself up. Give yourself compliments. Know your boundaries and
listen deeply to your needs. Always be kind and gentle with yourself
22) Nurture Yourself
Self care is very important. Set up some time
to be by yourself, just by yourself. Do something that gives you peace, love,
and joy with yourself. You can nurture yourself physically by exercising and
consuming healthy food. You can nurture yourself emotionally by listening to
love songs, painting, or helping others in need. As you give yourself to others
and offer help, you receive the gift of love back. You feel good about yourself
because you live your life on purpose. You can nurture yourself mentally by
reading your favorite books. You can nurture your spiritually by doing
meditation.
23) Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Everyone on this
earth is unique. We all have different gifts. When you compare yourself to
others, it makes you feel bad about yourself. When you compare yourself to
others for what they have, whether it is a car, a house, a mate, children,
money, or a job, it makes you feel low self esteem, lose your confidence, and
perhaps depressed, envy or jealous. A way to stop comparing yourself to others
is by focusing on your own strength. Get to know yourself and discover what is
your greatest gift that you are meant to share with the world. Another great
way is by practicing gratitude. Be happy for what you have. Really be grateful
about everything that you have; people in your life, job, relationships,
material, etc. Gratitude keeps your heart open to love. No one is quite like
you. Just be you. Be grateful for being the wonderful you. Do the best you can.
Be the best you can and love yourself more. Then, you have more love to give to
others
24) Stop Trying to be Perfect
Stop criticizing
yourself for being less than perfect. Always do your best. But, not reaching
perfection is not failure.
YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE TO LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE LOVED